This past Sunday, my husband and I celebrated 35 years of marriage. It feels like the right place to begin this blog, because so much of my story starts with him.
It started with a kiss
I was a 15-year-old freshman. He was a 17-year-old junior. We knew of each other, but neither of us had any interest in the other. Not one bit.
Then came a friend’s reception. Out of nowhere, he leaned over and kissed me.
It started with a kiss
Afterward, we walked across the road and sat on the rocks along Lake Michigan, talking as the waves rolled in. I didn’t know it then, but that night was the beginning of something neither of us could have predicted: a love full of passion and laughter, but also mistakes, heartbreak, and lessons I’m still unpacking today.
Happy Anniversary to us!
Thirty-five years later…
I can still picture it. It was evening, and we were sitting side by side on the swings at a little park near his house, swaying under the fading light, when he looked over at me and said, “One day, I’m going to marry you.”
I giggled. I was only 15, and he was just 17. What did we know about forever? He did, it seems.
He kept his word and married me five years later. Between that swing-set night and our wedding day, so much happened that it’s truly a miracle we ended up together. But I’ll save that story for another day.
Now, 35 years later, we’ve moved across states, built a life, raised our daughter, and welcomed three granddaughters. Not every season was easy. Like any marriage, ours has had its valleys. But here we are, still choosing each other.
My one piece of advice
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this:
People change, and so will you. Choose to love your partner at every stage and every season.
The person you marry won’t be the same person 10, 20, or 35 years later. In fact, they won’t even be the same person two years from now, and neither will you. Love means choosing them again and again. Focus on the good in them instead of dwelling on the bad. Marriage takes effort, and it’s worth every bit of it.
Love and marriage come with their share of battles, some won and some lost. I’ll be sure to share those stories and the lessons behind them.
Why I’m writing this
I’ve been asked more times than I can count, “Where are you now?” I’ve even been compared to Waldo, that little character you have to search for in a crowded picture.
I move around a lot. I hop between states, cross an ocean when I can, and come home to my girls. For a long time, I shared it all in pieces, here and there. Now I want one place to gather it all: the photos I’m proud of, the stories behind them, and the wisdom I’ve picked up along the way..
Partly, this is for me, a way to slow down and reflect. Partly, it’s for my daughter and granddaughters, so that someday they can read about the woman who kept saying yes. And partly, it’s for you, if you’ve ever thought it might be too late to try something for the first time.
It isn’t. I’m living proof.
Next year’s first is already on the calendar. I’ll tell you all about it when I get there.
And who knows? Maybe one day my husband will stumble across these pages and discover there are still a few things he doesn’t know about me. :-)
With love,
Her
